I just want to be good

Today is the only period of time in which I can possibly live.

I have learned that my life collapsed in part because I didn't feel I could say to my friends 15 or 18 years ago the above sentence (the title of this post).  And then say "I love you" and mean it.  This goes back to a trip to Paddy Mountain in July, 1999, when Marilyn, frustrated with me, told me that I in fact did love the other people on the trip, who I believe included Sylvia, Rusty, Chelsea, Jamie and ???   I think I just was afraid to make changes that would be strong enough to let things get better.  I thought it would be "stupid" to show confusion, vulnerability, anger or humanity -- queer humanity.  Now I'm 48 YEARS OLD!


Density makes life very cruel.

I apologize to those for whom I am not cared.  That means you.

It hurt to be a vulture.

There are people who have made these times more bearable than they would have been otherwise.  Thank you.


When there's love, and freedom, there's also peace.

I know this all sounds sappy, but that's what's there to say.  Today.

Be strong.

Yours,

Julia

Peace

Today I offer to you the kindness and friendship that are within me.

Today I offer you the beauty that I have found.

Always change when change is the way to nurture.  Always free yourself from pain.

The Goddess has made life for all.

No I was not a friend to my lovers.

Something to transform ... I hope.


]

rap is people

Playing around with negative energy like it's peaceful is damaging, painful, hurtful and atrocious.

peace

Mink

love

Estrogen.

No reference point

Hatred

Usually I would keep writing cryptically whatever, for me, "follows" from this state of being, attempting to relate it either to precursor states or to alternatives or to what might or might not account for its being so powerful in me.

Instead I will let go of any anger toward black women.

I am very strong and I know that I will be safe.

Thank you.



Maybe a good round.

As you know, it takes very much energy to believe that the world does not matter.

It does.

I am here, and alive, and my mother is also, and so is my brother and so are you.

I must undergo the consequences of anger.

Adios.


By:
Laminated ogre.

The ideological correlates of being better off than most

Me

Poem

Lazy

Dreams

Sartre made individuality a heck for his own championship. 

He would dress as a woman...

Thought of Dim bore.

The goddess deems poetic rap a paper tree.

I wither into your life.

Behind rape, heifer.

Dally with your membership.

Sounds of place.

After this, Lace.

REALITY:  Devils cold; their mission: fever.

                   Crap begins.




Drab as a lintel.

Ick was a rat.

Crack, bees, patience -- organism of pocket.

Yesterday and today are proving themselves to be full of painful adjustments to negative aspects of my life that I have not acknowledged.

Mexican people need to deal love for softness.

Sap is morgan.

I fucked a face.  This was Kiva.

I made pain a salad.

Crash.

Dean and I are losing to home.

This is the only time I will ever be a flower.

You know that I live here because there is someone that I am dishonest with. 

I am a trap.

Fame is cruel in its laces.

Where there is no vision, there is moose.

Let the Mexicans live for sharks.  Why be a cop.  I share this teaching to be pope.

Taste the round paper.

Test is me.

Hecate of the crossroads be famous.  Loudly.
 
Radical.  Slip  Whip Hip.

Crip.

Ask not reading for base.

Empire of Clive is mick.