Last Night

Thank you, C and R for having me go to last night's Poetry Reading in Woodstock (N.Y.)

Though while waiting my turn I thought I would bomb and that my poetry must certainly seem insubstantial in both length and quality, I went right up and delivered my lines with energy. I was surproised.

This was the first time in fifteen years that I had read poetry, at an event that I attended also due to C and R.

I hope that it won't be as long a break this time.

I really enjoyed the other poets, especially Bob Thomas, who made me feel like I had been a bore.

Finally, I am part of it.

Me have made pain strong.

I have to stop making life painful.

With the feelings that I have, darkness is a change. Hope can teach that I've been a pig.

I think that teaching that taking life is "dark" makes hate the motive of one's actions. Darkness has nothing to do with death. It is only a cry for life.

No one can be strong without having the courage to know that time only makes feelings part of life, not cruelty.

I have thought that in this world there is no "Cod". I am saying here that that's not true.

There is life, there is beauty, there is divinity in all creatures, no matter what gender. Stark hatred is nothing but the way that I made myself a "pest", i.e. a source of vengefulness, selfishness and anger. It's like worshipping all of that plus making all time bad.

Sounds grandiose?

It is that, but it's also completely factual.

I hope that in time I can let you know that I am approaching life with some degree of levity and good humor, and that there'll be a place for kindness and even love within it.

I force too much, but this is where my thoughts have led.

Poetry is not only a way to make words go together with music and rhyme but also a way to reach outward and inward to something that can teach, can bring about calm acceptance.